What type of drinker are you?
- Violeta Puente-Duran
- Jul 4
- 3 min read
Updated: 23 hours ago

Let's talk about drinking types.
By drinking "type" I mean are you a party girl (person), social drinker, stress drinker, food and wine pairing drinker, etc.?
When, or in what situations, do you like to drink? Asked less politely, what are your drinking triggers?
When you socialize?
Want to have fun?
Get home from work everyday?
Get home from work after a particularly hard day?
To accompany a nice meal?
To celebrate?
To enjoy a beautiful spring day?
By yourself in the evening?
To feel less bored on a Saturday afternoon?
To open up your appetite?
When you're stressed, angry or sad?
All of the above?
Drinking is learned (and boy is it easy to learn). You obviously don’t need alcohol in any of these scenarios. But you learned that drinking enhances the experience of this particular event or feeling (i.e. have fun, relax). And it can feel hard to go back from that. Like, who doesn't want to instantly relax? Seriously!
In other words, unlearning a drinking routine is anything but easy.
If I was a sobriety coach I’d tell you something like “You don’t need alcohol at all! Your best life is without it!” type thing.
It’s so true that not drinking feels good, especially the next day. But you’re allowed to want to have and enjoy a drink, if you so choose, as I do.
But you need to find that fine line between pleasurable and unpleasurable or excessive drinking.
I’m not going to define “excess” for you because I don’t know what that is...for you. And I'm not talking about the public health guidelines. You could google those if you're interested. I’m also not saying that you should never drink in excess (nor am I saying that should). So, what the heck am I saying?
You need to focus on the bigger picture when it comes to your relationship to alcohol. I’m not necessarily concerned that you drank a lot at your friend's wedding, or on vacation. But if you feel you're drinking more than you'd like more often than not, it may be time to take a step back and re-evaluate your drinking.
Some clues to look out for to identify that “fine line” might be:
You top up your glass on autopilot
Your “I’ve had enough” meter is rusty
You get to a point in your drinking where you feel you have little control, or it seems the alcohol is making all the decisions
It’s hard to feel satisfied with a couple of drinks (you always want another)
You crave a drink often and/or feel really bored or uncomfortable without a drink in certain situations
While I’m not a sobriety coach nor is my work based on abstinence, if drinking feels more painful than pleasurable in your life, you’re likely best off quitting altogether. And there’s absolutely no shame in that. Nobody needs to drink.
What type of drinker are you and how can you begin drinking less?
Here are some clues. For a more detailed answer as to what type of drinker you are there are quizzes online.
1) Identify your drinking “triggers”(what, when, where, why do you like to drink)
2) Observe what drinking does for you in those instances. For example, how does it make you feel? Not feel? How would you feel if you didn’t have a drink in that scenario? Become familiar with these feelings (without judging).
3) Recreate your drinking routine. Once you're more familiar with your drinking triggers (i.e. the type of drinker you are), and are more aware of how drinking or not drinking makes you feel, start disrupting the habit. For example...
Plan activities that don't involve drinking
Meet up with friends for coffee
Pour yourself a non-alcoholic drink when you get home (i.e. bubbly water, non-alcoholic beer or wine, a nice spritzer, etc)
Find other ways to relax at the end of the day (whatever works for you):
5-10 minute meditation or quiet breathing
journal or write out your thoughts
listen to a podcast or nice music
take a walk (in nature or a park if possible)
watch a movie or funny show
These are suggestions only. Find activities that make sense to you. Regardless of the activities you engage in, the not drinking won't feel great. And it's important to anticipate this. You may feel bored, feel like you're missing out, frustrated, or sad. These are normal feelings. Nothing's gone wrong.
If you'd like more support in your journey to drinking less, head to my Intuitive Drinking page to learn more about Intuitive Drinking coaching.